New Year Goals 2015

We are 3 days into the NEW YEAR... well almost 4 actually. I finally got around to organizing my goals into some kind of readable and understandable sequence. I decided this year to shoot for one life improvement a month.
 I took time to think about what areas I would like to change or improve and that I thought would make me happier this year. Last year I went through a lot of personal things, I always go through a bit of a summer time sadness in the middle of the year. This is really because CE is slow in Novi Sad in the summer, the lack of business affects my mood drastically. I am so connected to the business that how its doing has been the signs of how I am doing. Towards the end of this year I realized that I am much more then just one Cafe. I took a leap when I went to Graz, I tried to open myself to every new experience I could and see how I would fare as one little girl without a cafe standing behind her. Normally the security of CE and my place in the community of Novi Sad is so important to me, that I don't focus on who I am as an individual, I just see myself as this big lump of entrepreneurial business and all my thoughts and reactions are based on how the business is making me feel.
When I first came to Serbia I came with absolutely nothing that I had right now. I had to take a stand for who I was and decide what I wanted to do, all of these things strengthened me as a person, I took care of my relations with others, my reactions, myself... because I didn't feel I had anything that could define me.. So I had to rely on this little skin and bones body that I lived in, and of course my soul and spirit, that were my core. However like so many things in life, everything changed when CE came into my life, I took care of the business and not of myself. In so many ways my identity slipped and I felt like I had no skills or talents, love, compassion, honesty or strength to move forward in my life. I felt that if CE closed down or something happened, I would close down too.. I didn't know what I would do with my life.
When I went to Graz, I was scared. I was scared of failing, I was scared of people not liking me, I was scared that I wouldn't be able to handle the new business, I was afraid of being out on my own again, but I knew that I needed it. I went into it with an open heart, and I saw that I was a strong person, I understood that no matter what happened to CE, I could make something happen anywhere. I saw that there are good people in every corner of the world, that I would love, be loved and feel acceptance somewhere else. I saw that I could work in other businesses, that I could be a help to others and use my experience to make a difference. I know that no matter what happens to CE, Anna Powdrill is not going to close down, I know that I can make it and that I can learn anything I need to. I am so thankful that I took the risk of going into the next business venture of CE, as always its when you take that leap that you realize that you really can jump pretty high.
So in thinking of the New Year, I realized that I wanted to make not just business minded goals. I wanted to think about what I really wanted as a person, who I wanted to be. What things would make me happier. What things had made me unhappy this year? why did they happen? and most importantly... What could I do to change them.
I learnt a lot this year, I took time to write down a few main points for the lessons that I learnt.

1. Being honest is fair and loving I had a hard time this year having the courage to stand up to people that I knew were wrong, or were doing unloving things. However I saw that when I did get the balls to talk directly to people and to get the people out of my life that were hurting me and causing a lot of destruction, it was only fair to them. Fake smiling and passive aggressive behaviour is very unloving to someone, its sending them the message that they can continue with those actions in their live and its just wasting both of your time.

2. There is always someone who is a blessing in your life and who will make you smile I often focus on the people I don't have in my life, or people who don't like me, I used to waste a lot of energy thinking about them and trying to reconcile or bring people in. I learnt this year the value of the friends that are there, and that no matter who walks out, you need to appreciate the people that stay and not focus on those who actually don't give a shit

3. Everything changes, your feelings change So many times this year on a whim I felt like giving up, I was having a tough time with the staff and I felt that I was a terrible boss. Change and growth are kind of best friends with hard times... the two seem to go together. I learnt this year that all my feelings about myself or others will change, its not forever and sometimes you have to wait out the storm and just hold tight and try your best.

4. Jealousy and Competitive attitudes will ruin friendships, fight against it Through experiences with others this year, I saw the destructive and terrible power of jealousy. I don't know what it is about human nature that makes us feel that if someone is too good, we need to tear them down. I have done this to others and I have had others do it to me. Now after I saw how hurtful and unnecessary it is. I take an active stand against competitive attitudes, destructive and negative comments, observations and jealousy. If I notice someone is very good, beautiful or successful, and I feel a twang of jealousy. I go out of my way to compliment them and let them know how much I admire them, then I think about why, and I try to learn from them.

5. Be who you are and that's enough As I said in my text above, I learnt how to be a person who is a person.. not just a CE manager,

6. Relationships and friends come and go, don't make your whole life about them This was my hardest lesson. I am kind of ashamed to admit it, but quite a portion of my year was spent crying over or thinking about different guys or friends. When I took time to review my year month by month, I saw that lots of months really stood out to me with strong emotional hurtful memories of certain people. I feel that this year I wasted a lot of time with sadness about silly things. I see that people change a lot, they come and go. If you focus on them and base your happiness and security on them, you are building your house on the edge of a volcano, it might seem calm.. but it will erupt.

Ok so this post was supposed to be about 2015 goals. I sidetracked with this other subject of lessons learnt from the last year. Are we ready to leave behind the old and move on with the new? YES WE ARE

Focus of the month of January: Organisation and business (I will be detailing this in a later post)

February Focus: The say YES month... (don't laugh.. and yes in February ask me anything, i will be more then open to new ideas, thoughts, activities and fun)

March Focus: Happiness from the inside out (exercise, food and body)

April Focus: New skill month (I will try to work on one skill that I want to learn)

May Focus: Friends and relationships (This is a month to work on being a better friend, worker, boss, or whatever I am, and improving the relations I have)

June Focus: Family (figuring out ways to be a better member of my family)

July Focus: Love knows no bounds (I will be working on love, being kind, and helpful in a very proactive way)

August Focus: Money, Travel and One big dream (seeing as its my birthday I think its a good time to think about and work on a dream I have had for a while but am not active about. I also wanted to add money, as a time to think about my finances, where I want to be going with them and how I intend on getting there)

September Focus: Learn from others (this month I will gain skills, knowledge and different ways of thinking from people around me)

October Focus: Home skills month (I know I would make a wonderful housewife, but I lack knowledge of a lot of things that are done in a home, I want to work on improving my surrounding and focus on little basic things that everyone knows but I don't.. like buttoning my shirt up right... or cleaning my kitchen cupboards)

November Focus: Languages (This month I will focus on learning a new language to a really serious degree.. or progress with one I am already learning)

December Focus: THE EVERYTHING MONTH.. (I will try to be true to each of my goals and work on them all during this time.. so I will be a super loving, organised, shirt buttoned, listening, German-speaking, exercising person)

Now I know these are vague and without any concrete, reachable steps. The plan is to every month break down the goal into small steps. To make my list of to-do's and asses how I will judge if I have succeeded, and even more importantly if that success has made me happier. I will make the next post about my January goal and the smaller steps I am taking to fulfil them. I already took time tonight to organise all my business papers.. so I am off to a good start. 

New Year, part 1

Isn't it funny that we pick one particular day of the year and say it’s the end of something and the start of something else? Like.. why that day…

Anyways I do love New Year, I think its because I always like the thought of having a fresh start in something. I love to start a new day, a new week, change of country, change of season, and yes a New YEAR. Somehow I always think that this time.. I will really change and fulfil all of my dreams and goals. The thought of starting again has always really attracted me, and not just a little start again, a complete tearing down of the old and starting anew.

Last year someone asked me what I wanted for 2014… I said one word ‘Change’. I didn't mind what happened, I just didn't want things to stay the same. I didn't want to arrive at 2015 and be in the same place with the same people with the same problems and the same old negativity.

I remember on around the 3^rd of January I went with my friend for a walk and sat by the Danube, I carefully wrote down what I was hoping for the next year.

I wanted to write them here to show you what I was thinking and even I am kind of surprised that I put all of those abstract goals to be squeezed into one year. Today when I went through the 11 goals I had made, I only managed to fulfill 6 of them… arguably 6 and a half. When thinking about this, I realized that although all those things were good goals, some of them couldn't possibly go with the other ones, at least not for one human girl in one human year. I don’t think its necessarily wrong to put crazy goals that you don’t have a means to attain, you never know, one day you might have the opportunity, and just because it didn’t all happen for you in that year, doesn't mean that you won’t do it.

So here were my goals from 2014

1.      Keep clear financial records of every day of CE (I did not do this, although I did keep a very detailed book for about 5 months, I gave up when I felt it was pointless… ooopps)

2.     To Climb one mountain (When I was writing these goals, I had just read a book about the guy who climbed Everest, I was so inspired I put this goal. I did not climb a mountain, but I did cycle up one.. so I am taking this one as a done)

3.     To open the second CE (It is open… just not running fully… J can I take that one?)

4.      To keep the CE in Novi Sad open… YES IT IS… cha ching.. my first whole goal that is really and fully ticked off

5.      Perform in at least 1 stage show…(well, now I think I was thinking more professionally when I wrote this, but I did dress up as a Romanian magician and perform in front of all our guests at CE… I am gonna have to count it. I am taking everything I can get these days)

6.      Start saving towards buying a house (nope… my savings right now consist of a couple of 2 pence pieces wedged in between some crumbs and an old piece of chewing gum in my coat pocket)

7.      To Improve my coffee skills, Do pour over, be able to draw on the coffee and do a barista course (No not really.. though I did do pour over.. I can’t really take this one, a lot left undone)

8.      Learn 10 new recipes from other people (Me and Marija counted the new recipe’s I had learnt, and there was 6… so not quite there…)

9.      Learn more about building bikes and build 1 completely.. YES I DID IT

10.   Do another long bike trip over 1000k (I did ride to Budapest, a mere 300k, but that was the longest trip I did, so I cant really take it for the team)

11.   Spend time with God everyday… (yes I always have a spiritual moment on New Year, and as someone pointed out to me, if God is always with us, then we are spending time with him each day… So I think I can take that one)

So there are my goals from the year before, somehow it was hard to get all of that done. I also think I could have tried harder of course, and I will this year. I have decided to have a different kind of goals for 2015. This is kind of inspired by ‘The Happiness Project’, the author focuses on a different thing every month. She tries to work on every area of her life that is part of happiness. I think this is a great idea, and I will be making another post tomorrow about the goals I have made for 2015.

True Rules

The beginning of my notes on little rules that I found to be consistently true, or little tidbits of wisdom. Some are from my experience, and some i have taken from books that I have read, some were told to me by friends or people I have met.
I would be interested to hear if any of you have some true rules for yourselves, send them to me

If you are willing to take the blame, people will give you responsibility

Whenever possible, choose vegetables (I know this sounds wrong, but i was thinking in a nutritional way)

The things that go wrong, often make the best memories

Accidents are exciting stories (I always feel happy during and after an accident... that happens to me of course... I wouldn't feel happy if it was happening to you. I just love to tell people about the dangerous things that happened to me)

Flawed can be more perfect then perfection 

Always pack a sandwich for a long trip, you will be hungry

You can never buy too much toilet paper

Believing in yourself comes through experiences where you do not believe in yourself

A soft answer is better

A person who talks to you about others, also talks about you to others.

Adventures answer questions you didn't know you had (this one is a kind gift from Josh)

You don't regret the things you do, only the things that you don't

You will feel differently... soon

Fear will always be there, no matter what path in life you choose

Treasure your treasures

You do not know what will happen to you, neither does anyone else

Someones advice or criticism is still only their opinion

What is right or wrong look different to different people

Anger and hunger are best friends, eat before you get very mad at someone, you won't feel as upset.

Happiness is a journey, not a destination (we all know that one isn't mine.. it sounds too smart)

How low can you go...

hmmm this is an interesting post
I wanted to tell you about some of the embarrassing things that I have done over the course of my life, but then i realised i would probably be able to write a series of novels on that subject... with a 'to be continued' at the end of each one... because the embarrassing things don't seem to stop happening.
They always make for good stories during parties, so as soon as the initial phase of red cheeks and clumsily leaving the scene of the verbal or physical accident, I do enjoy to look back at some of the ridiculous things i have done and retell them to others with great enthusiasm.
Ok I need to start this article with a real starting point...
So I was talking to someone recently about... someone... who was in a new country, and who was very discouraged because they couldn't find a job, they couldn't fit in with the local people and they were quite alienated and feeling depressed. However this person had been offered some jobs in kitchens or lower kind of positions and had turned them down because they didn't want to do such a lowly job. Then they complained that there was no opportunity.
I really believe that opportunity wears many different clothes when it comes to knock on your door and whether you recognise your much wanted visitor is only dependant on how much you want to see it.
Before we started Culture Exchange, i had done so many humiliating, strenuous, low-paid, crazy and interesting jobs. Did I see my future dressed up as a french man on the streets of Birmingham selling magazines? (this needs further explaining) Did I really want to take care of that baby for 100 din an hour? Did I want to spend my life cycling around Novi Sad to every far flung corner to teach my private English lessons?
Well of course not...
The point was not what I was doing, but where I wanted to go with what I was doing that was important to me. I had to believe that all those little seemingly meaningless tasks and jobs that I was scraping the pennies for, was going to take me to a place where I wanted to go.
What would you seriously do to achieve your dream? How low would you go to follow your ambitions? How crazy and desperate would you be to make it?
I think that I have absolutely no dignity when it comes to getting what I want. When I see the goal in front on me, I fix my gaze on it, i struggle in every kind of way I might need to, to get there.
So what did I do when I came to Serbia as a 21 year old with very little skills, qualifications, money, possessions or friends?
Well soon after I arrived, I intended to be financially independent. I wanted to earn my money in Serbia and live in Serbia.
I had no idea what to do or how to get a job here. I started by scouring the local papers and also requesting jobs from any of my friends or people i met.
I found ads in the local newspapers and considered all of them, from cleaning houses and business spaces at 4 am in the morning to working on a cruise ship. It was a challenge for me to call the business to ask them to hire me, because i spoke such bad Serbian, and they spoke little English. There were many misunderstandings and long phone calls with google translate at my side.
Seeing as I wanted to get bar experience as we had the grand plans in the works to open CE, I also looked for work in a bar. I remember seeing the ad for a waitress at a Kafana and eagerly headed there to talk to the manager. He was very confused and asked me how i could serve the customers without speaking Serbian properly... i never got the call back.
In the end I worked several jobs at the same time. I placed an ad as an English teacher and started to get students, I charged a really low price and would cycle to their homes, 300 din an hour (about 2 euros) would get you an hour of me struggling to translate and teach English. I also worked as a dance teacher for some schools, I worked as a kindergarten teacher and took care of babies, I worked in 3 English schools some hours each week. I took every job opportunity I could, regardless of the pay. Why did I do this? because i knew my goal... to be financially independent and work as hard as I could in this new country. Every new task was a joy to me, and I learnt a lot from this struggling, though I was very tired. I made some great friends in this time and many of the people i taught and the businesses I worked for later helped with CE.
I remember seeing an advert for a cruise ship job and an address, i headed to the place only to find a huge apartment block with many different buzzers to get into the building, I had forgotten the number of the apartment, and I didn't have enough money to put credit on my phone to call them. I rang every buzzer, someone answered, I stumbled through my Serbian to try and explain what I was looking for, someone answered and led me to believe it was on the 11th floor. Up I went, waiting for me was a very old man covered in tattoos and wearing his underware, i wasn't alarmed yet (not the brightest girl in the school). I went in, his apartment door closed and locked, there were several unnerving facts about this scenario, one was that it was obviously not a office for a cruise ship (a little late to realise) the second was that his house was covered in children's teddy bears.... I had no credit on my phone, but needed to bluff. I pretended to call my boyfriend and said it was an emergency and i must leave, I left rather in a hurry without time for tea or coffee and sat on the outside steps very discouraged and shaking with fear. I eventually found the office, but did not get that job.
After we started CE, I had to stop doing my other jobs, as there wasn't enough time, and by then i was working on what I really wanted to do and was able to support myself with something I was really passionate about.
When you feel that you are nothing and no one, you have nothing to lose, so you try everything. This is a freeing and beautiful mentality that opens you up to people and experience like a dog racing out of the cage in hunt of its first meal of the day. If you are really hungry, you will find food. If you want it... go get it, in whatever way you need to.
I honestly think that If I had to clean the streets wearing a green and orange jump suit in order to get the money i needed to open CE or to fulfil any of my dreams, I would do it (I also like the idea of that jumpsuit). I would do anything that I need to do to get to where I want to go, and this is the point I wanted to make with this article.
Guys, don't hold back, there is really no point. The place where you start the race from is so different from the finish, and you cannot waste time sitting back and wondering if something is good enough for you, or if you are good enough for something.
Every day you are alive is one less day that you are alive.. do you know what I mean... it is going to end someday for each one of us, don't you want to know that you really gave every task your all, that you fought in every battle that you could find, regardless of its size or beauty. Try or die... and i don't mean to go to meaningless jobs for the rest of your life, just think about what you want and take any little steps, but take them thinking about your goal. You can't look at a big oak tree and be like.. yeah I want to be like that tree, but i don't want to be a seed. Its a painful, embarrassing, tiring and difficult procedure to get through the many steps that growth is, you also have to know when to say NO to things that are not going to go in the right direction, but I really believe that we mainly regret the things that we didn't do, not the things that we did. So go for it:)

Lot's of people all over the world, just like you and me, just ordinary little people.... are doing great things to change the world. Living where I do in Novi Sad, living the way I do, I have the pleasure of meeting some extraordinary people, adventurers and inspirational world changers. Being a cyclist myself, I love to open my home to other cycling enthusiasts, I am part of the warm-showers network (I know what it sounds like) its actually a network for travelling cyclists where you can find people to stay with, sort of like couch surfing but for the bicycle community. In my home in Novi Sad, I have a constant stream of people visiting, even though they always thank me and my roommate at the end for our kindness, I actually feel like thanking them. I need to meet these people to remind me just how beautiful life is, and to see that the four walls that I live in, the little cafe I own and all that I have physically around me are not all there is out there. The world is open to be embraced by arms that only need to let go of what they have in order to be able to hold it all.

In May last year I met 4 amazing guys who were cycling from Sweden to Muang Mai, Phuket. It is a journey of 16,000 kilometres, spans 18 countries and took them 9 months. Not only were they doing a brave and challenging thing, but they were doing it to support and orphanage in Phuket, they got donors to sponsor the trip and raised money for it (I am not sure how much). You can see more about their adventure here http://happytour.se/

I don't think anyone reading this who is not a cyclist can imagine cycling just that far. When I rode from Serbia to Istanbul it took me 13 days and in the end I wanted to throw my bicycle off the mountain (just for a couple hours, then i loved it again). For me it seemed that 13 days felt like a year.... I don't know how long 9 months felt like... but I hope one day to find out. The best way to make your life longer is to do something different every day, to take on adventure and risk as your two greatest friends, hold them close and go everywhere with them. You will understand when you try it.. they are truly the best friends you can ask for.

Now I can just imagine what some of you are thinking, you don't have money, visa's, equipment or any of the necessary things to take on these kind of adventures. This kind of thinking will most certainly land you in a 9-5 job everyday, living in a very boring way, and keep you safely inside your very sweet little home or apartment. You must think big before you can act big, If you want a really good story, start from nowhere with nothing. Most good adventures I believe should start with just that and nothing more. Your ideas are the very strongest thing you have, don't let them go, your faith in them, is the next strongest... keep believing. Plant the little seeds to get where you want to go.. they will grow.

I interviewed Fredrik Jessen, one of the travelling swedes. I found his answers so inspirational, funny and cool. I hope you will too. I am so happy we got the chance to meet these great people, and I hope that we will meet again soon... for now here is his account of their journey

What made you want to do a trip like this by bicycle?

My mate Calle sent me an email asking me if I wanted to join him on an epic journey across half the world to raise money to an orphanage in Thailand. I must admit I was a bit drunk when I read it but I think it took me like 10 seconds to decide that "Fuck yeah, lets do this!" so I called him and told him "I'm in!" because I knew I would hate myself if I'd turn down this once in a lifetime opportunity. This trip was a great way of combining an adventure with doing something good for others, not just doing it for myself.

How did your friends, family and other relationships react when you told them what you were doing?

My mom were a bit upset when I told her about which countries we would travel trough and I don't think she realized how determined i was to do it at first. But as we came closer to the starting day she kinda accepted the fact that it was going to happen. After showing her a few blogs about other people that peddled pretty much the same route she became a bit calmer about the whole thing.

I guess most of my friends never thought I would make it all the way since I'm not really famous for being an athlete, more the opposite, and everyone told me we would get killed in Iran and the stan-countries which turned out to be the friendliest countries we traveled trough.

What was the best part of the trip?

It's the question that everyone asks me and it's also the hardest one to answer. I don't have a specific place or country that was the best all countries were great in different ways. If I have to choose one I would say Kyrgyzstan cuz of the breathtaking nature, a country I'd like to go back to and see more of. Meeting all the great people from very different cultures and realising how nice and friendly people actually are, people like you!

What was the hardest part?

Not killing the ginger kids i was travelling with, surviving the heat in Turkmenistan, climbing the mountains in northern Turkey, not dying in Uzbekistan from the very nasty stomach bacterias, not freezing to death in the mountains of China, not killing the gay guy that molested me in Iran, eating kebab and köfte with dry rice everyday for a whole month, Headwind, always having to say good bye to the people you get to know, Sidewind.

What was the funniest part of the trip?

Meeting all the awesome people along the way. And crossing the finish line it was such a happy moment for everyone and it was so cool to finally meet the kids that we raised the money for.

How do you feel it changed you?

I'm definitely more patient and I've learnt to compromise, travelling and living together this close for over 8 months isn't easy. I'm more appreciative for the little things . One thing I realised is that I shouldn't complain about anything in Sweden. Sweden is a very functional country and there is few places in the world where everything just works as it is supposed to work like here.

What advice would you give to other people who are considering doing something similar?

Go alone, that will give you the freedom to stop where you want and see whatever you want and eat whatever and wherever you want. Get a Brooks saddle not a racing saddle as I had, your ass will thank you. Buy a proper bike with good gears and good brakes it doesn't have to be a touring bike a MTB will do just fine. Don't bring to much stuff you will just end up sending it home or leaving it behind. Save up more money then you think you'll spend, It's a cheap way of travelling but the money has a magic way of just disappearing anyways! Get a free standing tent (one you don't need to attach to the ground)!

What do you plan to do now that the trip is over?

I had to borrow money from my mom and dad to be able to finish the trip so now I'll just have to work and pay em back. My plan was to move back to Australia but I'll think I put that one on hold for a while. I kinda realised living here in Sweden isn't to bad for now. I dint think I'll do another cycling trip in the nearest future but I'm addicted to travelling and seeing new places so who knows where I'll end up next time.

All of them at our house in Novi Sad

At the finish line, after 9 months of cycling

Steps you can take to prepare yourself for your Next BIG Challenge

Whenever I know I have a big challenge ahead of me, I do everything possible to prepare myself for what is ahead of me. This is normally because I mostly know NOTHING about the different things I have tried to undertake.The feeling of being completely clueless and the impending thoughts of failure because of my lack of knowledge force me to seek everywhere to know and learn more about the things that I want to do.

The real truth about preparation is that you will never be fully prepared for what is up ahead of you, but there are certain things you can do to work on your skills and knowledge. If you think about it in the way that you are preparing for a long race, you don't just turn up on race day and be like 'oh yeah I'm here' and expect to do well. Well maybe you do. Most people take time to train their minds and bodies to be ready for what is ahead of them. Everything in life can run along with these same principles.
Before I even arrived in Serbia, as soon as I knew I was going, I studied Serbian language and culture from every angle I could. Although I didn't have much time before I would arrive, I studied an online Serbian language course and read everything I could about the history of the country. I watched a series of documentaries on Yugoslavian history and I also watched lots of movies about people which up and changed their lives. 
What can you do to prepare for opening your new business, here are some things that I did, maybe they will be helpful to you
1. Read about it
When I knew for sure that we were with a green light to try to open CE (Before we even had one penny of money towards it, or knew much about anything) I bought two books on amazon about setting up coffee shops. I even made a short video on my camera, with my talking about how this was the first steps of preparation. I unfortunately cannot find that video, otherwise I would post it here. Reading about opening a shop really helped me to see the experience of others who had done the same. I also read some very uninspirational articles, such as one called 'how opening our own cafe ruined our lives', which did make me a bit afraid, but yes they were right...it kind of ruined my life in the beginning, as everything else went to pieces and the only thing I could think about and work on was the new business. It also, like most challenging and difficult tasks, made my life amazing. Every situation is different and no book can really charter your journey or tell you what kind of weather conditions will be going on in the sea of business you will sail in. Research is an easy and fast tool to use to your advantage, google the things you want to know, get some books and it will give you a slightly clearer picture of what to expect.
2. Ask Questions
There is no way that you can come from a position of knowing nothing to knowing everything in a short amount of time. So many things about business can only be learnt from experience, but some things can be learnt from the experience of others. Ask questions wherever you go, to whoever you meet. I remember going into a bar in Serbia and asking the owner if I could go behind the bar to take a look at the kegs of beer to see how much space we needed. I asked my friend who owned a coffee machine to let me have a try to make a coffee on his espresso machine. I asked the owners of another place to show me their cash register. I asked my friend who worked for a bar to help me decide which drinks to order and what a bar's first stock list should look like. I asked every kind of question I could think of, sometimes i think I came across really dumb and annoying (I've dealt with this before). There is no point of being shy when you need help with a big task. I love it when people come to the Cafe and ask us for advice on our business and other people are normally more than happy to share with you the things they have learnt. You can also gain good friends this way as you bond over business and progress, rather then gossip and useless things. 
3. Learn the language as much as you can
If you are trying to open in a foreign country, it is a matter of respect to learn the language and to try to understand the people. Even if your business will be operating mainly in English, as CE is, people really appreciate the effort and time it takes you to learn and study their language. When we arrived in Serbia we went through a year of Serbian school, we all studied the language together. In my spare time I studied our workbook and worked hard on my studies. Even though I am not perfect at Serbian, I do understand a lot and use it every day when I serve people or when people come to talk to me inside CE. I don't really understand when people say that learning a language is hard so they don't do it. OF COURSE ITS HARD... aren't all things that are worthwhile kind of difficult. I think when you learn a new language its kind of the same as when a baby is learning its first words, it takes a few years to get a grasp of it and understand and a really long time before you can learn it fluently (unless you are talented with these kind of things). For me, it has been heard to learn Serbian, but I cant describe how good I feel when I can talk to people and also understand what they are saying, it makes me feel closer to the whole community and also smarter ( I don't get that feeling much)
4. Help others for free
If you want others to help you and be part of the new community you are building, you must be willing to take the first steps into the new country and be a genuine helping hand and a friend. Your deeds of unpaid kindness and going out of your way to be of assistance in every area will not necessarily be reciprocated right away, but they will be. I have seen so much bad business policy from owners who are very stingy, and don't reach out to do anything that they are not gaining from for the community. I think that this is a very bad way to run or start a business. You must be willing to give before you receive, cultivate a giving attitude in your life and business and it will come back to you 100 times over. I learnt this so many times, I couldn't possibly name to you the amount of times I have seen this rule of the universe go into effect at my life. One example, when I arrived in Serbia my friend told me that her mom had been fired from her job as a seamstress, this had put the whole family in a tough situation as they really needed the money. Her mother could continue to work if she had her own sewing machine, but they had no money to buy it. Even though at the time I was saving money to open CE, I put the money in an envelope and dropped it into her hands. I never expected a return in any way and I felt good to have helped. This friend repaid me the money 2 years later (even though I never asked for it back) she also became one of my best friends and helped us with one of the ideas that gave us the finances to open CE. She was the friend that told me about indie-gogo (an online crowd funding site) and encouraged me to make the video and put it out there. The video raised 3000 dollars for our opening. If you give you will receive.. keep that in mind and keep your heart and hands open to help those around you.

Travelling home for Christmas

I am going to England for Christmas, I will be gone for 10 days.

Its been an interesting end to the year with so much happening on every side, travelling, meeting new people and lots of new experiences. With so much going on back here, I thought it was important to make some goals for my time back at home with my family. Sometimes when I go there, I think a lot about the Café and I sort of don’t give my family as much attention as I could. On some trips I have been so beset by worry that I have spent much of the time there looking on the computer at CE and checking my messages. I always feel I have to be on call and ready to jump to help if there is any problem. So far on every trip away, no one has died.. Living by the principle of living in the moment, I will be trying on this trip to enjoy every second with my family.

I left home when I was 15, since then I have hardly seen my parents and brothers and sisters, let alone the extended family of cousins and other relatives. When I stop to think about that amount of time, 10 years is a long time to be gone. So much has happened to me in 10 years, I am not surprised that we sometimes feel distant. I want to be as close to my family as possible, I can see that each of them has grown to being such complete people, with so many wonderful qualities.They are all smart, accomplished and lovely people. I am immensely proud of my family, not one of my brothers or sisters is in serious trouble, without a job or is depressed. It’s such a gift to be surrounded by inspirational people on every side. 

My goals for being at home with them are 1. Have one deeper conversation with each member of my closer family 2. Do one activity with each member of my family that they enjoy 3. Compliment and encourage them each at every moment I can find. 4. Find out 3 new things that I didn't know about each of them

Last year I also had a lot of travelling goals that I didn't accomplish, such as going to Nepal, climbing a mountain, doing a 1000k bike ride. I wasn't able to fulfill all my expectations this year, however I have realized that every day is an adventure if seen in the right way. I will be on this trip treating it as if I was going cycling to India… no I won’t be packing my saddle bags and wearing a helmet on the flight, but I will be

1. Talking to as many new people as I can 2. Exploring everything 3. Eating new foods and trying new drinks 4. Looking at the country like a new cultural experience

Over the time away I will be writing my blog and filling out the details of what happens on the journey.