The subtle art of Rejection

When you feel that you cannot be good at anything in life, and all your talents and skills are meaningless in today’s society… do not give up… there is one thing you can become skilled in and learn to handle that will help you in you future. REJECTION is a scary word for all of us, when we get rejected in any area of our lives our ego is hurt and its hard for us to feel confident in ourselves. However I have been making many a mental switch these days, figuring out why certain things trigger negativity and depression in our lives. I have realized that although it is hard to be rejected, I can learn to handle it in the right way, so that every rejection inspires me to achieve more, be better and understand others.

THE REJECTION CHALLENGE

When I was in Graz I read an interesting article about a guy who experienced a heavy love rejection, it had been so hard for him that he had become a total introvert and didn't go out anymore or talk to people because of his fear. He realized how crippling it had become to him and decided to take action to get himself more used to being rejected. In order to do this he set about getting one rejection every day, he would ask people absurd things and challenge himself to be in rejectable situations so that he could toughen himself to those situations. If you think about it, one person telling you no to something has no indication of the real evaluation of your life or skills, most people’s perspective of you or of what you are doing when they tell you ‘no’ is more of a direct reflection of them then of you. The more times we put ourselves out there with the possibility of being rejected in any thing, there are also more chances of being accepted. If you try more, you will probably lose more, but also probably win more.

I set about making myself a similar challenge to this guy, every day I tried to do one thing that was scary or counter intuitive. What was funny was that I didn’t end up getting rejected as much as I thought, I actually got more accepted. For instance I went to a pub with my friend for a drink, I asked for the manager and requested a job, he asked me to come back for an interview… I was really surprised, but somehow it worked and gave me a great feeling of confidence.  I didn't keep the challenge up for the whole month of February, but the times when I did try it made me realize that sometimes we are not trying anything because of fear of not getting a positive answer.

There is a quote that I guess we all know, it says ‘fortune favors the brave’. The more accepting we are to say YES to more things and not to fear the answers and responses from others when we suggest something, the more chances we have for something to go right. I want to create more opportunity for opportunities in my life, by asking more questions, being more bold, and not being afraid of the response.