Ending A Chapter

Alright, now is the time to put together some thoughts about the recent events.. and also to talk a little bit about the past and a little bit about the future. 

CE in Novi Sad has closed. The beloved little coffee shop had been open for 5 years now and its really run its course. My emotions on the whole project remain very strong despite not being physically there for the last 2 years. For the time that I did live in Novi Sad and when I was running the CE, it was my whole life and basically the only thing I did or had time for. It was so enveloping as a project that I found it hard to do anything else, I never took holidays and I hardly ever had days off. All of the crew who have run CE since I have left know exactly how much effort and emotion the whole place took. One of the reasons why it was so difficult to keep going was simply the economic climate in Serbia, where the bills and expenses were high compared to the income the place could receive. Not wanting to make this solely a commercial venture, CE was always a community space. In other countries we could perhaps get funding for this kind of idea but we weren’t able to do that in Serbia for some reasons.  Looking back on the last 5 years I cannot say that this business was a failure. Indeed we lost money through this, as we put it, it was a big space in everyone’s heart and a little hole in your pocket. However looking at impact, social values, business experience, people that were helped, and the different ideas that have sprung out of the original root.. we have to give some credit to the venture, it may not remain open but it made an impact in so many ways.

I remember very clearly the first opening day of CE, more than 5 years ago now. I had nerves hitting the ceiling and I was so afraid of it failing in the first days or month. I remember just running off at night before the opening to go sit by the river and listen to music. My head was jammed with all the details of the opening and I was feeling so unable and like I was the last person in the  world who should be trying this. I remember thinking ‘why.. why did I have to do this, I am setting myself up to be super humiliated in this community, everyone is going to see it fall and just realise what an idiot I am’. Well the first weeks and months of CE passed and then years, new challenges presented themselves every step of the way, the fear of it not staying open past a month was gone, but there was always a different battle to fight.  The whole time I lived and worked in Serbia was the hardest time of my life so far, but also the most memorable. The struggle to work this business in this country was pushing me in every way. Those who know me well, know best the emotional breakdowns I had and how difficult this was.  I just want to clarify here that I was not the only person who started CE or who kept it running, there were so many people who participated and made the project run. The only reason I will talk now about what I went through is because I am writing it from a personal angle and I can only say the things its made me feel. I know that each of the original owners and every other person who worked at CE has every right to feel like the place is theirs and yes it is… anyone who has been to CE can understand and knows that it was all of ours and it made all of us feel something special . 

Many people have asked me how I feel to close it and see it closed, yes its sad… of course… but everything  comes to an end sometime and somewhere. We see it in nature and in our lives all around us. Goodness.. even we don’t last that long.. It can be kinda sad sometimes, but its also beautiful, knowing that from the end of one thing, you can let go and begin with something else.  Nothing material lasts forever, what I think will last and what I am proud of is the memories of all the good that happened in that one little space. I remember always thinking.. it’s a small room, but its got big stories.  I met amazing friends through CE, so many hilarious and heart warming moments happened there, I performed so many crazy things (even doing my Romanian magician show), I also saw so many great couples get together there, so many friends meet and relationships formed, some wonderful live music happened there, so many performers from all over the world were on that tiny stage, so many people presented their life stories there… so much more then I can even write down.

So the closing party was June 30^th, I walked into CE and immediately tears started, it was not that I was sad but that I was overwhelmed by everything that had happened. It was coming to end and that was the end of one chapter. Now its time to begin the next one. 

Andy and Ana have started a little café in the centre of Novi Sad called ‘Little Bits’, its like a tiny CE, if you are one of our customers and you are wondering where you can go… think no further.. it should definitely be your next hang out spot.. make it your regular coffee place.. it’s a business venture by a couple young people with real vision to make something nice for customers and staff. So support them in every way you can and the most important way is to simply show up and when you think of going out with friends for a drink… you know what to do.

Culture Exchange in Graz is still open, the 2^nd baby is alive and well.. Although only 2 years old and is very different from the first.. what will happen with this venture.. well.. only time will tell.