The Flow State
Again a long pause before an article.
Now this one is going to be loooooong, its been a very crazy month and half. I wanted so many times to sit down and write what was going on because so much was happening, but with all the work and filled up days I just didn't have the time.
For the last 3 weeks or so i was working with Danny and Lani on rebuilding the CE in Serbia. There are no two people in the world that I would love to have such an experience with. If you ever meet Danny and Lani in real life, you should regard them with the highest respect and love, hug them lots and treasure them. They are real treasures, people with pure hearts and I could not be happier to pass the running of CE in Serbia on to the two of them. That's right, they will be the main people running the cafe and bike shop in Serbia, they are more then up for the challenge and will do an amazing job. Before we could open we had to get renovating, I don't think any of us really knew that we would be renovating the Cafe to that extent.
We got new ventilation through the whole place, really beautiful lighting, a new floor and remade most of the furniture. The whole project was a challenge for each one of us, but a wonderful one. There is something really special about working in CE, it has this great feeling, like you are doing something so worthwhile and special. I feel the Cafe in Serbia has had such an impact on its surroundings and its has a truly magical air about it. We had to learn to do so many things ourselves, me and Danny were youtubing so many of the jobs that we did not know how to do and learning it all from scratch. That's part of what CE means for me... doing stuff that you never did before, trying, sometimes failing... but in the end making it work. I learnt how to build a table-top, put a laminate floor in and use all the power tools... I feel really accomplished and grown from this time. Not only that but how incredible to see the work of your hands open, filled with people and flowing with positive energy. I feel so blessed from this precious experience and so thankful to everyone who came along to help us with all the little jobs.
To mention a few special people i have to explain a little bit behind the story. A lot of our customers who come to CE in NS kind of mention to us that the reason they don't come more often is because a lot of young people are hanging out there, drinking their hot chocolate and relaxing... I can agree that when there is a crowd of loud young people it can be a bit annoying... but i kind of think that goes for a loud group of any kind. I have to say that i love the young people that come to CE, they are the future of the city and I am happy that they have a place they feel comfortable and hang out, i got to know personally so many of them and share moments with them. They are so young and full of life, venerable and honest. In particular two of my young friends came almost every day to help us rebuild CE. Sara and Lea came after school and worked with us on so many annoying and tiring jobs, they never complained. We asked so many times if anyone wanted to help us with the work of rebuilding and many people came a couple of times (thank you so much). I just want to say that these young people (who I am happy to call my friends) are so inspiring and pure hearted, giving their time and effort without asking anything in return. CE should always be a place where everyone feels comfortable, and especially those people who care about it enough to not just drink a hot chocolate or beer there, but to actually work along side us and be our friends in every difficult moment.
Danny and Lani still have visa struggles in Serbia, actually they are waiting now, every day for their paperwork to come through. Apparently the police are pretty suspicious about why they are back, they think they are spies. All you have do it meet Danny to understand he would be a completely useless spy... i think they should consider that... I will admit Lani is a sneaky one,... but as far as I know she is innocent. Also even though I have a year working visa in Serbia, because I have given the company name over to Danny, I cannot work in CE.. its a the wild, wild east out here and its pretty hard to understand the logic behind rules such as that. I feel I have really adjusted to the Serbian way of life.. i take everything that happens now with a grain of salt and laugh a little about it.
I had some really interesting travelling during these weeks of going back and forth between Serbia hitchhiked with my friend Bozi from Graz to Novi Sad.. it was a wonderful adventure, we made it in 9 hours even though it was pouring with rain the whole day. Between the next trips I managed with car sharing (blabla car), the bus (which is super long and boring) and on this last trip, i did part by car sharing and part by hitchhiking. I broke my virginity of hitchhiking alone... It was a strange feeling to be standing on the side of the road with your little bag and ukulele and putting yourself out there. I thought of going back to my friends in Maribor and staying the night and then continuing on the journey... but then I thought how that will ruin my faith in life and in people. I want to believe that the world is good and that people out there are kind and want to help, just as I am kind and want to help them. I wanted to experience rejecting in any form that people wanted to give me. I stood there and thought 'I am here, I am alone, I don't have to be, but this is a choice i have made, and I am not afraid'. I realised then that through those hard depressing months in summer I had come away stronger, more courageous and that i was not afraid of the future. The questions about where I would live in Graz, what would happen to me.. would I ever find some life partner and all the rest just floated along on the calm seas of my mind. The sun was shining, the wind was blowing and I was there, young, strong and with a heart full of love and courage.. how could I fear? at this moment I knew that life is beautiful, a treasure and that i am thankful to be here. I have no idea what will happen in the next two months or so, I still need to find an apartment in Graz and find a way to earn some real money... but I believe it will come to me, that everything is flowing as it should.
So looking a few days into the future... I have a TED talk coming up, 10th of October. I am very excited... I have not prepared at all, but I will the next few days and will be posting the video of what I do end up talking about.
I want to talk for a moment about the CE team.. the ones that I work most closely with are Danny, Lani, Simon and Mary. As some of you may know, building CE and working on it has not exactly been a piece of cake. Every single one of us has made some sacrifices, lived on a tiny budget, given up some other dreams and worked very very hard. Lets talk for a minute about Danny and Lani, Danny and Lani are kind of from Miami.. as we know its most peoples dream to live and work in Miami. Danny's dad operates a successful business and Danny could work there too... Lani could live in a cute little house, go to the beach every day, have her kids taught in English speaking schools and go shopping with her friends. But these guys decide to come back to Serbia, the country they were humiliated and deported from. They decide to invest the money they have worked for 2 years to save in a tiny little cafe business with a bike shop, they decide to put their kids in a school where they don't speak the language, they decide to risk everything to try. Simon is from the States and Mary is from Greece, Simon was working in America and doing a successful job, their kids went to and English speaking school. They decided to uproot their family, put all their savings and time into building a new business in a country where they did not know the language, did not know anyone and had never lived or worked in. Their three wonderful children go to a school where they have to learn German, they work every single day all day on building a new concept here in Graz and work their way through the maze of heavy paperwork and physical work to make CE here real. Not only are they the hardest working people I know, but no one has a better heart then Mary, who works constantly and never gives up.
Why do they do this? why do any of us do this? we know its hard, we know its unusual, we know we will have to work very hard for an indefinite amount of time, we understand the risk.. it could fail, we could all be left with nothing, back on square one, forced to uproot and change once again. We all know that this is not an easy or well walked path. I know the feeling I have when I am working with these people, its the feeling that we are building something important and that lasts, the feeling that your life is building into the future and that this project is worth fighting for. CE is very special because of the people that run it, the story that is behind it and all the feelings and battles we have faced to get it to this point and we still have a long way to go.